Fuck pal, if your ‘knowlage” is my strength, we’re in the shit, aren’t we?

The mind boggles…!

This is the bar downstairs from the office:

It’s very up-market, expensive drinks, bouncer at the door, uncomfortable seats, dress code, and…

Jerry…!

SA is known for it’s farming and other such Afrikaner sports. So it’s no surprise that when it comes to food products, there’s a lot to choose from. Over the past few weeks I’ve been conducting a test to see which are the best overall extra large-size eggs Joburg has to offer. The eggs that competed were:

* Golden Lay

* Farmer Doep’s

* Pick ‘n Pay No Name

The results were as follows:

* Golden Lay: Very hard shell, which makes cracking them open quite a mission, often resulting in the most of the egg white falling outside the bowl. Yolk size – medium. Score: 6/10.

* Farmer Doep’s: Man, did I regret buying a 30-pack of these bad boys! I thought Farmer Doep would be as cool as Farmer Brown! Very brittle shell, making separating the yolk and white a task so insane that it spoilt more than one day for me. Yolk size – smallish. Score: 3/10

* Pick ‘n Pay No Name: Medium strength shell, making cracking and separating a pleasure. Yolk size – medium. Score: 8/10.

There you have it folks, the best eggs in Joburg belong to the coop-slaving chickens that produce for P’nP! Congratulations, your bag of seeds are in the post.

ps. Is it too late to enter the Best SA Food Blog?

A little more Kate for your masturbatory pleasure:

Even more to come soon…!

The world really needs more cocksmiths…!

(Link via Gabbahead)

My mum will be so proud…!

There’s nothing worse than driving behind a truck, on a single lane road, and the bastard has a “Driver instructed not to drive in the yellow lane” sticker on the back. I think it’s unfair, especially if he’s driving like a granny. However, I wouldn’t complain too much if I was stuck behind this truck, I’d be laughing too much.

(thanks to Jan for the pic)

I want it all. Now. Really, there’s too much good stuff to list, give me the whole damn lot.

Gentlemen, start your credit cards…!

It’s testament to the fact that there actually is such a thing as bad publicity when you consider that after all this time, you still see more of these irritating fucking billboards on the road than the actual car.

It’s not that I don’t like the car, it’s fine for what it is. It’s just that the marketers failed to understand the basics of cognitive linking. Here’s a quick lesson: You see (hear, smell etc.) something, this is stored in your RAM. Your brain does a quick check of your ROM to find something to associate it with, and voila, that something is filed.

In this case then, your brain spots the billboard and searches for something similar, it finds this in the file marked, “stoopid, childish, irritating wank” and it is stores it there. Sadly for the manufacturer, the car is now stored there too.

I’m being flippant, but this is really what’s happening here…!

I spotted this on a public toilet door, amongst offers for me to put my “long hard man-meat” in some nice gentleman’s bottom, while spending a penny in Rivonia last night:

I’m quite relieved that I cant make out the exact text…!

(better pic here)

Yup, definitely the best name possible for a product that helps with voice clarity…!

How often does it happen that you’re greeted, by name, by the person at a client’s reception? Now, how often does it happen when you haven’t visited that particular client for almost a year?

Edward, from the JSE, made today that extra special.

It’s not just the slappermail lads that have (super-fucking) hot readers, we have Kate, and she’s not a slapper like their biatch (although if she’d talk dirty to me…), she’s a local lass too.

I asked her for the rest of this photo series but I fear her mail might be lost in the ether (Kate if you read this, I still don’t have any naked pics of you, please, please re-send).

Don’t make me beg woman…!

Ten times over! A man in Cape Town has had his Toyota Hilux bakkie stolen ten times, and had it recovered every time.

He’s obviously not with these okes!

One of the blogs I collaborate on (albeit in a teeny weeny way) is up for best group blog at the Business Blog Awards. Be a sport and pop over and vote for 800-CEO-Read. You need to be quick though, voting closes later today

Much obliged…!

Go read this now…!

The new VANS laws look crazy, borderline criminal in fact. (thanks John and Wolfy for the heads-up)

Essentially it makes tools like Skype illegal, and best be careful if you’re offering VoIP. Shit, even our WiFi network could land us in the slammer.

This. Just. Can’t. Happen…!

“A man that carries a memory stick is not a geek, he’s just prepared.”

- Don from Jo’blog

Last night myself, ../Ant and our significant others headed off to the Nelson Mandela Theatre (civic) to watch the “Shaolin Monks” perform their “Wheel of life” show.

Now, I’d be lying if I didn’t say that I had higher expectations, but that isn’t to say that I didn’t enjoy myself. As a kung-fu practitioner, the form work was my favourite, the choreographed sparring my worst, there was also some great strength/body control demonstrations. However without a doubt it was the kids that stole the show.

Go see it, it’s worthwhile…!

you’ve got a trackback spam problem when…!