A 72-year old man woke up after an operation, only to be told they’d snipped his balls off instead of removing his prostate gland.

He says “he is experiencing emotional problems and having hot flushes.” He’s “also short-tempered and put on 10kg since the operation.”



Methinks they snipped something else off too!

In search of the perfect watermelsh and granadelsh, Jan and I braved the long trip to Joburg central-ish to join thousands of Portuguese people, and other plebs like ourselves, for the annual Lusito Land Festival.

We were entertained by solo singer Costa (surprised?), and were also treated to an air show performed by the Mazda Airo-guys, or something like that. We got right into the spirit of things by walking around looking for bargains, talking loudly and sucking down on a traditional cocktail/punch drink, Caiparinha. Food was a major attraction, with half the festival consisting of food stalls. With espatadas made from a whole cow, each, we decided to go small with a chilled sit-down with prego rolls, chourico sausages, chips and rolls. Very yum indeed!

We ate good Portuguese food, sang along to Julio Iglesius cover songs, watched planes, bought clothes and had a really cool time. It’s been running since 21 April and ends on 2 May. If you’re into good food and good fun, take a trip out there, it really rocked.

P.S. You have to have a Caipirinha. Tastes like juice, knocks you like a hammer.

If D’ave can brag, then so can I. I went under the needle again two weeks ago, and this is what I walked out with.

(Best viewed with your head tilted to the right)

Designed by Jan and myself, thanks to Marcus from Evolution in Roodepoort for filling my skin with the blackness I love so much. He rocks!

Fuck, never a dull moment…!

Willem Louw from Danville risked his life after chasing four armed men that had just hijacked a car.

Now, as heroic as that may be, is it not also extremely dangerous? They even shot at him! During the chase he even managed to flag down a police car to join in. They eventually recovered the car, but not the robbers.

What a man.

I want you to know that this fucking kills me…

Go read Seth’s papal post at 2Oceans$‹@&

I laughed out loud.

Luckily no-one was around at the time…!

Ever feel like you’re in your own Truman Show? I do, often. But even more often lately.

Every morning on the way to gym, without fail, we have to stop at a particular set of robots. But these aren’t just any set of robots, these are the robots from hell. Robots designed by the Dark One himself. They’re evil.

So we stop, ‘cos it’s red. After waiting a few minutes the left side goes amber, then red. A minute later, the right side does the same. Then, they go green again! And we sit, ‘cos it’s red. Then both sides go amber, then red, and then our robot goes green so we can go.

And I drive, looking around to see if a hidden camera is not-so-hidden and I’ll bust the ones trying to make a fool of me! One day they’ll slip up, or a big light will fall out of the sky. Either way, I’ll be a happy man. But please, stop with the devil robot!

(thanks wolfywuff)

Although I have to say, I tried watching the re-run on Sunday and found it really dull…!

Fuck, I can’t resist any longer, it’s my virgin Hoff post (I feel liberated):

(pic from rooibos)

It’s a good thing it’s not my arse that’s sore…!

So I just got a comment on the “grapes” post from Jax.

Jax writes the very readable more adult blog:

Jax’s email addy is from moreadult.co.za, a site well worth a visit.

Jax, a guy called Roy is probably going to contact you…

He’s cool…!

I got my camera ready to capture the big moment:

Oh. Great. Idols III.

‘Cos lets face it, that last two we’re such successes, the music world hasn’t been the same since.

You know what the thing for me is? It’s the fucking judges, they just lack credibility, I mean look at their track record, it speaks volumes. Especially that Randall twat, a Simon Cowell wannabe, just without all the platinum artists in his resume. – shit, he’s also the station manager that fired Barney. What if I don’t like fucking RnB? Wanker! (oops, sorry lads, more lawyers’ letters.)

Oh well, if you’re 30 or under and want us to laugh at you, you can enter here.

Sadly, I’ll probably be glued to the set…!

…compliments of Splattermail. Thanks guys.

Thank you so much for all the traffic, we’re using our hit counter as a fan at the office.

My my, aren’t the minions vocal, alas what they lack in intellect and the ability to address the actual issue, they sure make up for in passion. Indeed, I’m in absolute awe, you could invade a small country with that much cannon-fodder, they’re truly adorable.

Sadly though, they seem to prove my point.

Glancing at your lovelys’ links I see that they’re all, bar two, email addys and not blogs. You see, I was never arguing about your content , you’re without a doubt a far better writer than I, I was simply saying that in the spirit of things, you’re not a blog, a fact I still believe.

You have readers, we don’t, we form part of a larger community. You tell stories, we dont, we start and participate in conversations.

Conversations and community = blogging

What I have seen from the feedback though, is that your readers are obviously keen to show their support, why not give them that chance on your website? Why not let them have their say? You talk about not having the time, and various technical reasons for not giving it a go, but I assure you, you could maintain the integrity of your site structure and still be up and running within a day or two.

Still you may be right, tell you what, here’s a challenge for you: add a feed, add comments and add permalinks, and if no-one uses them, I will happily, and publicly admit defeat.

With respect,

Richard Mulholland

Blogger

joblog.co.za

P.s. Normal programming will resume shortly…!

While driving last week I was speedily passed by a fat black Mercedes-Benz, on a single lane road, the driver just missing an oncoming car. The punk obviously didn’t know the road, because about fifty meters on was a robot, and it was red.

So there we sat. Waiting. Together.

Just then, out of the blue, he sticks his head out of the window and launches a projectile loogie any primary school boy would be proud of. And that’s exactly what I thought. Big fancy car, well-dressed, and spitting like a child.

Hanky, anyone?

Goes to wolfywuff for this gem:

Hell yeah.

Much obliged…!

Jo’blog is proud to host the first annual:

“Alliance of limp-wristed Capetonian fuck wanks” conference (ALWCFWC)

Would all delegates kindly leave a comment here.

Thanks…!

Update: Man, You gotta love this chump-styled pic.

I just read in biz-com that Stanley, from Cape Town’s Platypus Productions, is attending MIPTV an audio-visual and digital content conference in Cannes.

Sticking with the theme, he’s vlogging, blogging, and podcasting.

Alas, no comments or trackbacks. Pity, I wanted to moan a little about the (lack of) imagery in the vlog, think of it as a podcast with a talking head, hardly the best use of the tech.

Having said that, it should be good stuff.

Respect…!

A great sting operation.

Zim style.

Full of clever twists, turns, and splashes.

Disney movie imminent…!

Hot chicks blog…!